The Death Cat stalks its next victim.

A cat who was adopted by the staff of a Rhode Island nursing home has
now been responsible for the deaths of 25 patients.

The cat, who goes under the innocent-sounding name of "Oscar," was
originally allowed to stay at the nursing home due to his positive
psychological benefit to the patients. But after months of observation
it has been found that Oscar will occassionally jump up and curl himself
on a patient's bed. The patient then dies, "usually within four hours"
according to the staff.

Some say that the cat is "psychic" and is predicting the patient's
death. Others, however, feel that like most cats Oscar is a pawn of
Satan and is sucking the souls out of the elderly and the infirm.

Don't let this madness continue!

Sign the petition against Death Cat and get rid of this evil feline
before he kills again!

You can ask Winona Ryder all about evil cats.
She owned a couple of them when she lived in Salem.
Or at least that's what everbody said. And they must
be right, right? Of course. That evil witch Winona!