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Paris Hilton with her purse dog.

Well there's been stuff all over the media and the blogs lately about
Paris Hilton being named either the most useless celebrity or the most
useless thing in general — so much so that it has really been impossible
to find the original source.

But no matter. The idea is that Paris Hilton is pretty much useless one
way or another. In line with a "kinder, gentler" blog these days, I would
like to take objection to that.

Paris isn't totally useless. In fact I came up with some good points about
her, which I will share.

USEFUL THINGS ABOUT PARIS HILTON

1. Bucked the whole "big mean dog" trend in favor of the "small fashion
accessory dog" thing.

2. Brought a touch of class into the otherwise sleazy world of vagina
modeling.

3. Has read a good book lately.


Proof of Paris reading a good book.

4. Has given literally dozens of ultra-rich, adolescent girls a new bar to
cross.

5. Is going to throw a "really big party" in Africa, which I suppose is
good news if you are invited to the party.

6. Provided lots of free advertising to Blackberry by losing her
Blackberry; also provided lots of free advertising to the color "pink."


The Blackberry. It's not just
for smart people anymore.

7. Actually did jail time for a DUI as opposed to being found innocent on
a murder charge.

8. Has made thousands of honeymoon couples feel less guilty about their own
hotel room videos.

9. Has provided income to hundreds of paparazzi, who otherwise would have
had to have kept up with the much more quickly-moving Britney Spears or
Lindsay Lohan.

10. Has provided good material for millions of bloggers on otherwise slow
blogging days — kinda like this post.

11. Seems to love her younger sister Nicky a lot.


Paris loving her sister Nicky.

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