Damn this horrible devil's game
which consumes me!
It's time that I faced up to it. I have a problem. Well actually I have
a lot of problems, but this time I'm speaking of one specific problem —
my terrible, chronic gambling habit.
I'm just addicted to pitching pennies. Today, for example, I lost 12 cents
pitching pennies with a couple of out-of-work musicians in my basement.
But sometimes it gets far worse than that. Only last week I lost 38 cents
pitching pennies with an alcoholic homeless guy who I ran into out in front
of my grocery store. I figured it was my "lucky day" of course. I could just
"feel it in my bones" that I was going to beat his pants off. And it started
out okay. The first couple of rounds I was ahead of the game. And at that
point, of course, I felt like I was on top of the world. But how far you can
rise, only to fall so low when pitching pennies! That homeless guy had a
good time that night, I'll tell ya, drinking a 40 oz. Old English out of a
paper bag which he had got with my money.
I don't know why I do it. Yeah, it's the thrill. And it's the skill. But mostly
it's just the moving in for the kill — that feeling you get when you get that
final penny to hit that wall and, like it had suddenly run out of gravity, plop
right down in a vertical drop. There's nothing that beats that feeling. And
somehow, the fact that I might have 10, 20, perhaps even (it's crazy!) 50
cents riding on it gives it a feeling like nothing else in the world.
Well, there, you have it. My confession. That's the first big step, of course.
Admitting you have a problem. So now I will seek professional help. And hopefully,
with time, I can come back from all of this and forget I ever heard of the game
of pitching pennies!