An ancient cat calendar from 1993 found on E-bay has raised speculation
that the world may soon be coming to an end.
"Interpretation of the calendar, when examined in great detail, strongly
indicates an impending apocalypse in 2011" said Dr. Harold Carter,
professor of comparative folklore at the University of Northern Eastern
"The photo of the black Persian featured for the month of April is an
obvious reference to the Zoroastrian belief in two contrasting powers,
one light and one dark, that will wrestle with each other at the end of
the world," Dr. Carter said.
Carter said that other months indicated impending disaster as well. The
Siamese cat for the month of July is said to represent the fury of the
Egyptian goddess Bastet, while the Himalayan shown for the month of
September represents the Hindu god Shiva, the destroyer of worlds.
"It was August that got to me most" said Carter. "The photo of that
little kitten lying on the pillow scares the crap out of me. Innocent
looking or not, the kitten is actually a daemon who eats souls and
then vomits them up like fur balls onto the Plain of Eternal Sorrow."
Carter is not alone in his interpretation of the calendar. Many across
the globe have come to view the cat calendar as a revelation. And in
fact a screenplay made from the predictions has been picked up as the
basis for an apocalyptic action movie starring Randy Quaid.
So when will the world end? "It is apparent that it will end in December"
Dr. Carter said, shaking his head sadly. "Because there the calendar
mysteriously comes to an end on December 31st."