Congress has told us that we must sell off everything in
order to balance the budget and keep the war going. So we
at the National Gallery of Art in Washington D.C. are
announcing a one-of-a-kind

Fire Sale!

You just won't believe the bargains you can now get on
some of the world's finest art!

Think how impressive this gorgeous Manet would look on the
wall of your high-rise condominium in Beijing!

Call toll-free for a price quote!

Does your taste run more towards the mythological? Better
grab this wonderful Watteau before it goes!

Like modern art? Or need something non-representational
for your palace in Riyadh? This Rothko is among the very
best pieces we have!

Are you an oil company, corporate CEO, or investment
banking house? Good news! You may qualify for a 15
percent discount!

And if your taste runs to the decorative arts, believe
us there's plenty to choose from — like this 16th century
Ming cup from China. These ceramics are being offered
at never-before-heard-of prices.

Looking for something both beautiful and functional?
Impress the guests at your chateau with this stunning
Sienese plate — perfect for fruit, caviar, or patte!
Supplies limited! Better hurry!

But you say you are just an ordinary poor person and
can't afford art? Well we have lots of interesting objets
d'art offered at this sale at a very reasonable price, like
this wonderful antique door knocker taken from our very
own historic building!

But wait, there's more! Every purchaser at our Fire
Sale will receive a ticket for a drawing giving them a
chance to be "first in line" to buy the historic
Spirit of St. Louis, which will be put on sale at
the Smithsonian Garage Sale to be held next winter.

This art sale is too good to miss!

Our courteous museum curators are standing by the phones!
Call today to make an appointment to visit our many galleries —
and get the art of your dreams!